I am still unsure if divorce is the right answer
“Can my marriage be saved? Should I keep trying? Why didn’t marriage counseling work? Am I going to regret my decision either way? Should I just stay in the marriage for the children?”
There are few decisions in life more difficult than deciding whether to stay married or get divorced. That you are reading this is an indication that your marriage is in serious trouble and it may be too late for reconciliation.
But there may be a unique solution you might not know about: A Post-nuptial agreement.
A Post-nuptial agreement (or Pre-Divorce Settlement Agreement) might save your marriage.
At this stage of your relationship, you may have said and done things to cause major damage to your relationship. Perhaps there have been threats of divorce or talk of hurting one another in a divorce. All that negative energy can suck the life out of any chance of marriage counseling effort.
To overcome this problem, we recommend working with a mediator to put an agreement together outlining all of the terms of what divorce would look like IF the parties divorce.
By doing this, they eliminate sabotaging their efforts to reconcile with continued divorce threats. The parties already know and understand what to expect if they divorce. A signed agreement binds them to those terms if they choose to divorce.
Putting the steps in this order allows space and room to talk about the real issues in the relationship without the doom and unknown of the terms of the divorce hanging over the counseling sessions and a real pathway to divorce or reconciliation can emerge.
We are the first mediation firm to develop the post-nuptial mediation process and have seen it increase the chance of a successful reconciliation by 70%.
In the event the couple does choose to divorce later, they are able to do so with much less difficulty and animosity because they have already agreed in advance how they were going to settle the divorce issues.
If you are not sure that divorce is the answer but you are worried about marriage counseling not working, please consider this option. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.